Monday, August 30, 2010

"You're a girl" and other realizations from this weekend

This weekend was pretty great.  I say pretty and not totally because (thanks to a certain friend) I came to the realization that I've got a little bit of crazy going on.  I think I knew that, but as I was describing my weekend over dinner last night it was like the clouds parted and the sun shone down on LoonyTown. 

I went to dinner last night with a good friend of mine to hear all about his weekend trip to Cali and to fill him in on my weekend with the guys.  His weekend seemed normal, fun, all that jazz, and when I began to describe my weekend he kept repeating one thing over and over and over again: "You're a girl."  By "you're a girl" what he was trying to say was, "You are absolutely crazy and these feelings that you're describing to me are only felt by the females in this world and I can't relate to you because you don't make any sense."  After thinking about it, it's obvious to me that I over analyze everything and beat it to death with a stick.  I'm going to stop that (at least as much as possible since I am a girl).

But before I stop that, let's analyze some thoughts that popped into my head this weekend!
  • I have the best girlfriends in the world:  When I didn't want to be at a party anymore, I called a girlfriend at 3:00 in the morning to come get me.  She was there in under 15 minutes.  The next morning when everyone was still asleep and I needed to talk, I called another girlfriend and asked her to go to brunch with me.  Again, 15 minutes.  I love that they're there for me at the drop of a hat, and I hope they know that I would do the same for them.
My hot mess of a self getting picked up for brunch
  •  I need to eat: When I was 17, I was anorexic and severely underweight.  I was the same height that I am now (5'8") but I hovered around 110-115 pounds and thought I was disgusting and huge.  Looking back at pictures it was apparent I had a problem.  I looked like a walking skeleton.  At this point in my life I am no where near that low weight, but sometimes I catch myself not eating and I have to physically force myself to eat whatever is on my plate.  I'm talking independently think about each action: pick up food, open mouth, put food in mouth, chew chew chew, swallow, repeat.  It's so strange because I'll feel full, like I stuffed my face 15 minutes before, but in reality it will have been hours since my last meal.  It happened a lot this weekend, and I noticed it and it scared me.  I'm constantly dieting (that's another girl thing, right?), but I try to be healthy about it and, ya! 
  • Making out is fun!:  If you're a participant...
  • Sugar-free Red Bull is the best drink on the planet:  Everyone complains about the taste, and possibly the jittery feeling, but I love everything about the heavenly nectar.  I actually love the taste!  It's my perfect pick-me-up beverage.  When I'm feeling the the least bit tired I drink a can and I immediately feel refreshed.  Literally immediately.  It takes only seconds.  This is probably one of those mind over matter things, but I wouldn't give up my SFRB for anything.
The big cans are better!
  • Affirmations are wonderful (and not given out nearly enough): I met up with my college roommate and her current roommate (two girls who I love ridiculous amounts).  The three of us went to the pool and chit chatted for awhile.  Then we started just giving each other affirmations, which are so great!  I left that evening feel so good about myself and loving my friends even more.  
  • I'm a child:  My college roommate gave me two awesome gifts: a velcro paddle ball and a ribbon dancer ribbon!  (This is going to be me someday!)  Another friend gave me Dots because no one else wanted them because they're the best candy in the world!  All of these things made me so happy.  It was like Christmas!
  • I'm selfish: When asked why I love Dots so much, it wasn't because of the gooeyness of the candy when you bite into it, or the bevy of flavors, or even the brightly colored candies themselves.  I love Dots because no one else does.  Sharing isn't necessarily one of my strong points.  (I'm an only child.)  When I go to the movies and get a box of candy, I don't want to share it!  If I go to the grocery store and pick up some candy to munch on later that week, I want it to be there when I go for it!  If you choose a universally delicious candy, like chocolate covered raisins or Skittles or Junior Mints, those babies have a very short life span.  When you choose Dots, they will stay on that shelf until you're done with 'em! 
 That's what I realized this weekend.  Don't you feel like you know me just a little bit better now that you've gotten a peek inside my mind?

Including the crazy, the weekend was quite eventful!  There was
ghetto club dancing,
That is the best Tres Leches cake ever!
a birthday, late night FINA tacos,
an end to sobriety (bottomless mimosas--hold the orange juice), pool days, night swims, a shower with four people shampooing each other, multiple Red Bull runs,
new friends,
new aviators, and a restful ride home.  Thanks for driving this weekend C!

UPDATE!  I totally forgot about this song that was brought to my attention last night by my roommate and then sent to me by my college roommate.  Thanks for making this a part of my life.  Forever & Always Your "Home Home Homeboy," Nicole


  1. See, the thing is this. I have recently noticed how much we reinforce our own gender roles with that one sentance "You're such a girl".

    Just because you think through your emotions and actions doesn't make you "a girl". It might drive you a little crazy if you do it too much, but it has nothing to do with your gender. This kind of rhetoric is not only hurtful to girls/women it's hurtful to boys/men who feel like making themselves emotionally available isn't okay.

    If your friend couldn't empathise, he shouldn't have invalidated you by writing off your thoughts and emotions as you "just being a girl".

    I don't know, maybe you do need to chill a little bit and let some of the smaller things go, but you shouldn't try and change the way you think just because you think it's "too girly".

    Sorry if I'm being a little too serious :P

  2. I'm pretty positive he didn't mean it in a hurtful way. It was more joking, but it did make me realize I was over analyzing every little thing in an unhealthy way. I get where you're coming from though!