Tuesday, August 10, 2010

Scarcity of Love

This week marks the one year anniversary of my most recent break up.  I have been single and without a love interest for 365 days and that astounds me for one reason: I'm okay with it.  Everyone wants to be loved; it's inherent in our human nature, but I want to be loved for the right reasons and I want a love that will last.  Too often in the past I looked for love in the most obvious (read: terrible) of places--parties, bars and the like.  As a young woman, I am preparing for the love of my life. 

In my 23 short years I have learned so much about what to do and what not to do in relationships.  There have been many many many many many mistakes along the way.  Finally, I realize (truly realize and completely understand) I have to be an individual comfortable in my own skin without someone to validate me in order to have true happiness, and a significant other would only increase the happiness, not be the ultimate cause (and potential end) of my happiness.  (Damn the man who didn't tell me this fairy tale growing up!) (Side note: I love in the Sex and The City movie where Carrie reads Lily Cinderella and at the end she says, "you know this is just make believe.")

Some of the things I've been doing to be a better individual:
  • journaling
  • reading
  • learning how to cook
  • trying new activities (kayaking with Cooper, stand up paddling, running)
  • spending time by myself

It's made my life more relaxing, and I enjoy contemplating the activities of my day and thinking back to my reactions to see if I would have done anything differently.  If you have any suggestions for ways to be a better individual I'd love to hear them!

This is the article that got me thinking about writing this blog entry: http://www.oprah.com/relationships/How-Love-Works-Healthy-Relationships

1 comment:

  1. Once, when I was a little girl, I was riding in the car with my mom and one of her girlfriends while they bitched about men, thinking I wasn't listening. At some point, exasperated, by mom said "There just really is no such thing as prince charming".
    She says I immediately said "what!?!" and started bawling.
    I think she still feels guilty for breaking the news.