Monday, November 29, 2010

Sorry for the radio silence...

I was busy at work the week before Thanksgiving and then on vacation for a week, but I'm back and I have lots to share!

Tonight I'm going to edit and hopefully put up pictures from my fabulous birthday party.  It was the best birthday I have ever had and I'm so thankful for my wonderful friends and family who made it possible.  I love each and every one of you so much and am so happy that we're a part of each others' lives. 

This Thanksgiving was one for the record books.  I went to four different Thanksgivings and each one was wonderful in different ways.  The first one was with my company and it's always nice to get to know your coworkers a little better, especially since I'm a bit secluded from the rest of the office.  The second dinner was with friends from my kickball team--good food, fun games, and a warm bonfire!  The third Thanksgiving was on Thanksgiving Day with the Kennedy side of my family in Michigan (where I was for the past week).  My aunt and uncle are amazing cooks and dinner was awesome.  I love being with the whole family for holidays.  My last dinner was a surprise after a crappy flight experience and was delicious and full of old friends.  It was such a nice ending to a pretty perfect vacation.  I was even reunited with my pup after 10 long days.  I sure did miss that monster!

Thanks for your patience since I haven't been posting.  I hope your Thanksgiving was full of food, family, and friends and you enjoyed your time off.  I know I did!

PS: My friend Brian has an AWESOME blog.  He's a really funny writer and has a very interesting story. 

PPS: It's Christmas time and I couldn't be happier.  This truly is the best time of the year and I have a perma-smile on my heart from the love and joy this season brings.  The decorations and music are pretty great too!  That's the lobby of my office building.

Friday, November 12, 2010

Are you kidding me?!

Two weeks ago a blogger for Marie Claire told the world that she was uncomfortable watching overweight people get intimate on the new TV show, Mike & Molly.  Her opinion has caused her a lot of backlash because we live in such a politically correct world that if your opinion offends a certain group then you are labeled a bully or a bigot or...a weightistOf course it's more aesthetically pleasing to watch two fit, beautiful people canoodle on your favorite show.  But that's not why I say "ARE YOU KIDDING ME?!"

My issue is with a word that, frankly, is completely ridiculous.  Weightism.  WEIGHTISM.  That has got to be a joke. 

Racism.  Ageism.  Sexism.  Weightism.  Which one of these is not like the other?

If you guessed weightism, you'd be correct!  And why is that Nicole?  I'm happy you asked!  You see, while race, age, and sex are something that you can't change without extensive plastic surgery, weight is something that can be controlled by an individual without a scalpel.  You're not born fat.  You get that way through unhealthy eating and exercise habits or things like a screwy thyroid (which can be controlled with medicine).

There is no reason to be cruel to others who are different from you and I don't agree with it, but weightism is completely ridiculous!  I struggle with staying at a healthy weight, and I know it sucks to diet and exercise when I'd rather be eating a big, juicy hamburger, but we're adults and need to take responsibility for our actions.  "Weightism" only exacerbates America's weight problem.  We spent over $147 billion directly and indirectly on the costs of obesity in 2006, and we've expanded since then. 

When are individuals going to stop coining new terms to make themselves feel better and instead, channel that frustration in healthy, productive ways such as educating themselves on proper nutrition?

Thursday, November 11, 2010

Wanna know how I handle situations I don't want to handle?

I pretend like they never happened.  I stop communicating with that person/those people and *poof* it never happened!

It's such a healthy way of dealing with things, don't you agree?

[image courtesy of]

(: Happy Blog :)

Photo by Jon Spot Photography
This picture makes me want to yell "BUBBLES!"

I've noticed that a lot of my blog posts are a bit dramatic, emotional, and not very happy or positive.  I think in general I'm a very positive person, or at lease I try to be.  My blog is my space to rant I suppose.  Hopefully it's still interesting even if I do come across as moody.

I wanted to do a giveaway when my blog counter hit 1000 hits and that was 100 hits ago soooooo...


I'm giving away a shoebox of STUFF!  I don't know what yet but I do know it'll be amazing!  Probably very Austin-y and also reflective of ME!

In order to be in the drawing you must:
1.  Follow me publicly.
2.  Leave a comment telling me about the best surprise you ever had.

Good luck and Happy Veteran's Day.  Thank a soldier you know.  They do so much for our country so we can live our happy lives at home.
[image courtesy of]

Wednesday, November 10, 2010

Day 10 → Someone you need to let go, or wish you didn’t know

My cousin.  By marriage.  Does that make it any better that I wish I didn't know my cousin?

We were the absolute best of friends as kids.  We would dress in matching outfits and had to do everything together.  When we went out to stores or restaurants people would ask us if we were twins, and we loved that.  Of course, we said yes every time.

Things were great until my senior year.  I went through a lot of crap.  A lot.  Some brought on by crazy teenage hormones and some from bad people.  I think my cousin tried to be there for me and help, and maybe in the end it was too much. 

I moved out of my parents house the summer before my senior year of high school because of an argument we had.  I came home after curfew, was told I was grounded, and immediately packed a bag and walked to my friend's house.  My cousin drove to Austin to take me back to League City with her.  We lived together at my aunt and uncle's house and eventually moved into an apartment of our own.

Moving into the apartment was terrible for everyone involved.  Her mom (my aunt) was pretty adamant about not letting us move out.  I think she saw the whole idea as mine, when in reality my cousin had come up with the plan and I agreed.  Of course a seventeen year old girl would rather live on her own with no rules.  Why would I say no to that and continue to live with my aunt and uncle who were much more strict with me than with her?  My aunt did things like take all the drawers out of my cousin's furniture so she wouldn't take it.  The whole situation was handled in an extremely juvenile way on both sides, which is pathetic considering my aunt was the adult in the situation.

I was going to school, coming home and napping, and then working full time waiting tables.  I was incredibly lonely, depressed, and had next to no friends at my new high school.  It was pretty pitiful.  I even dyed my hair black and wore all black.  It was a very dark time for me.  I'm really embarrassed when I see people from that high school because I was so different and I don't feel like I was myself at all

The issues between us arose because she would spend more time at her boyfriend's house than at our apartment.  Like I said before, I was lonely.  She was my best and only friend in town and when she wasn't at the apartment I had no one else.  I started to call my mom all the time and we worked out some of our issues over the phone.  One day on the phone she asked if I wanted to come home.  I said yes and within hours she and my dad were at my apartment helping me pack and move out.

My mom paid to break the lease and for my share of the bills (electricity, insurance, etc).  I later found out my dad had paid her too.  She was upset that I was leaving, and I completely understand why.  She would either have to move back to her parents (and our moving out had caused a big rift between us and that part of the family), move in with her boyfriend, or take on the apartment lease by herself.

She ended up moving in with her boyfriend (now her fiance).  I received a letter a couple weeks after moving back to Austin that had copies of the bills and a letter asking for us to pay her for breaking the lease and for the bills.  I called her and told her my mom had paid her.  My mom called her and told her she had paid her.  (At this point we were still in the dark about my dad also paying her.)  After that things were tense and we stopped all communication.

At my dad's funeral we put everything in the past and it was like the apartment argument had never happened.  Then a couple of weeks after the funeral I get a phone call asking to pay her back for the bills...again.  It was then that I realized that our relationship would never work and I stopped all communication with her. 

We had to sell my dad's things because no one had the space or need for them.  One of these things was his gun case.  A couple months after the funeral when all of the money was being put into an account my mom asked my uncle about the gun case, and he said he had given the money to my cousin because I owed her money.  That was extremely disappointing to hear but not at all surprising.

And I wish I didn't know her.

Student Loans and Stress

There is only one thing that really, truly stresses me out on a daily basis.  Money.

I've always hated money.  I hate what it does to people who go from having nothing to having more money than they thought was ever possible.  I hate that when my dad died I had a family member ask me for money.  I hate how people who have always been "comfortable" don't understand the struggle that others with less go through on a daily basis.

Of course, I appreciate money for some things like you know, eating, a place to live, basic necessities...but as long as I can pay my bills, have some spending money, and save a little I don't need anything more.

An article from September of this year discusses the crazy tuition hikes we've seen that don't at all reflect inflation.  Connecticut State University is in talks to freeze tuition and fees.  (Texas, you hearing this?)  In the past 32 years tuition has risen by over 1000%!  That's THREE zeros!

What's shocking is that now student loan debt surpasses credit card debt in America.  In other words, WE ARE SCREWED.  There are not enough jobs available for college grads.  When we do find a job our ginormous loan payments cause us to not spend in other areas college graduates have had the fortune of spending on in the past--homes, cars, etc.  It not only hurts us, but it hurts our economy.  It's just one more reason our country is in this financial disaster.

Honestly, it's not unlike the housing fiasco that got us into this recession in the first place.  Just like banks gave money freely to people to buy larger houses than they could really afford, banks gave out student loans like they were going out of style...oh wait.

Since graduating from college I have not had one job that needed a college degree.  Sure, it helped me get the job I applied for and the company likes that a college graduate is intelligent enough to interact with clients, but my mounting student loan debt is a joke next to my salary and I could have done this 5 years ago right out of high school.  My struggle to pay my bills is real and not fun.  My parents help me every. single. month.  I'm pretty sure I have an ulcer (or kidney disease or cancer or a panic attack or diabetes according to WebMD).  I can't eat without feeling sick.  I wake up nauseous.  I'm losing weight (though I'm not really complaining about that).

I'm a smart girl.  But I was very, very dumb with the choices I made in college that will now haunt me for the remainder of my financial life.  I should NOT have taken out so many student loans.  I should have applied for grants and scholarships.  I should NOT have majored in English and instead chosen a major on a definite career path.  A Liberal Arts degree is junk unless paired with a graduate degree or specialization of some sort.  But by golly, I can read, write, and discuss literature with the best of 'em!

Tuesday, November 9, 2010

Day 9-- Someone you didn't want to let go, but just drifted

I don't feel like answering this today so here's a Spanish proverb I like:

How beautiful it is to do nothing and then rest afterward.

[Photo by Kamuro]

Monday, November 8, 2010

Too good not to share

[Image courtesy of]

Day 08 → Someone who made your life hell

Honestly (and this feels like such a cop out), but see Day 4.  That was my hell for about 6 months...

Thankfully at this point no one is making my life hell.  I'm really happy with where I am and who I am right now, and I can only see things getting better.


As some of you may know I'm currently having a weight loss competition with one of my besties.  I would like to lose weight for Julie's wedding but the only way that I can lose weight is if I make it a game.  That's why I like Boot Camps or classes at the gym more than jumping on the elliptical for an hour.  I get so bored. 

I've finally found the secret to weight loss.  Are you ready for this life changing bit of information I'm about to tell you?  DANCING!  No, not in a studio like I did when I was in high school.  I mean dancing in bars to loud, booming music to the point that you are sore the next day.

Losing weight is sort of a double edged sword, because while my clothes are fitting clothes are fitting looser.  I'm going to have to go shopping for new clothes!  Woo!  I guess it's not that terrible.

I hope you had a wonderful weekend!  Mine was full of birthday celebrations AND DANCING!

Day 07 → Someone who has made your life worth living for

My family makes life worth living for. 

I strive to be a person my dad would be proud of, and when I screw up I am determined to fix my mistakes and move forward because I know that is what he would expect of me.

I try to be a role model for my younger cousins.  No family is perfect and sometimes I feel like my family is the furthest thing from it, so I want my younger cousins to have positive influences in their lives who they can relate to.  The ten year age difference between us is perfect because they see me as a friend, but at the same time they know I'm an adult and are conscious of the decisions I've made such as graduating from college, getting my own apartment, and paying my own bills.

I am so grateful for the rest of my family as well.  I look forward to growing old with them and continuing to share Thanksgivings and Christmases with our expanding families.  I can't wait for all of us to get married and start families and for our kids to be best friends just like my cousins and I have been since we were kids.

Saturday, November 6, 2010

Day 6-- Something you hope you never have to do

I hope I never have to attend a close friend or family member's funeral while we're still young.

It is always so tragic when someone leaves this earth too soon.  I would be devastated to lose a close friend or one of my cousins.  Of course I would be devastated with the death of anyone I'm close to, but when someone young dies it's seems unfair that they didn't get a long life like my grandmas or grandpas. 

Let's go forth on this Saturday on a happy note.  THXTHXTHX is one of my favorite blogs.  The notes are the writers "daily exercise in gratitude."

[image courtesy of]

Friday, November 5, 2010

So amazing how people change

Jay-Z is a former crack dealer turned successful rapper and producer.  He's coming out with a memoir next week and after reading some of the excerpts I'm really looking forward to this book.

The New York Post has some excerpts here.

I really like the cover art as well.

I love my friends

That is all.

Day 5-- Something you hope to do in your life

I'm 23 (almost 24...yikes!) so there is so much that I hope to do in my life.  At this point the number one goal that I am actively aiming for is to open my own art gallery.

For most people that know me that doesn't seem like it would be my go-to answer, but working in Florida made me realize what I want to do.  While in Florida I was one of the directors of my uncle's non-profit organization for children aging out of the foster care system.  If you haven't educated yourself on the tragedy that is the foster care system in America, please do so.  There are articles here and here to give you some information.

I knew moving back to Austin that I wanted to continue to work in the non-profit sector.  I love the marketing aspect of business, and I can use my skills in that for marketing and fundraising for a non-profit organization.  Making bank for a non-profit is much more attractive to me than being a droid in a corporation.  I want to have an impact on the world and I think my art gallery is a great way to do it.

The plan is that my art gallery will support other non-profits via donations and art auctions.  I don't have any of the specifics yet, but I'd like to feature a non-profit organization either monthly, quarterly, or possibly yearly.  It will take more research and experience to figure that out.  The art would ideally come from the organization being sponsored and could be a variety of mediums--paint, sculpture, drawings.  The more varied the art the better, I say!  Pieces could also be donated by supporters to be auctioned and cash donations would be accepted to help the gallery pay for fixed costs (rent, electricity, salaries, etc.).

I'll probably have to continue working my full time job in addition to the gallery for a while so that I can pay my personal bills and put money into the gallery myself.  So two full time jobs at once...awesome!  It's ok.  Sleep is for the weak.

Thursday, November 4, 2010

Day 4-- Something you have to forgive someone for

A couple days ago when I wrote about something I love about myself, one thing was how I forgive rather freely.  Go ahead and refresh your memory on the forgiveness steps.  I'll wait.  Ok, got it?

Apologies are very important to me because it denotes a closure in a sometimes circular argument.  One side (or both) is conceding their "victory."  I appreciate and need closure in an argument in order to feel like the person who hurt me acknowledges and understands that their actions aren't ok with me and should not be repeated in the future.  After the apology, I move on and am over the argument.  However, no apology = grudge for life.

I realize this isn't healthy and it affects me more than it will ever affect the person I hold the grudge against.  There is one group of girls in particular that I've had a really hard time forgiving.  I want to forgive them just to get rid of the anger and hurt that they caused, but every time I think of the events that transpired and how things were handled I get upset all over again.

In the Fall of my Junior year things were going great.  I was living in my sorority house with my two best friends, making good grades (my first semester to almost get a 4.0), meeting cute boys at frat parties, and having an all around blast.  But when you're on top of the world you eventually fall down.

We would all pregame together, party together, walk home in our shacker wear together...but something wasn't quite right.  My best friends' behavior and attitude towards me was changing and I didn't know what was going on. 

One night we had a group of girls in our suite to watch Grey's Anatomy before heading downtown--our usual Thursday ritual.  During the show I started to get ready during the commercials.  No one else did.  I asked if we were still going out.  They said no.  That was fine with me because I was still hanging out with my besties.  I quit getting ready and actually took my makeup off and was ready to get comfy and stay in for the night.

After the show I left the room to do something and when I came back all of the girls were gone.  I went downstairs to see if they were in the room of one of the girls who had been watching Grey's with us.  No roomies, just the girl who lived there.  I asked her if they knew where my roomies were.  She told me they were getting ready to go downtown but didn't want me to go. 

It felt like I had been punched in the stomach.  I had known something was up, but why would the girls who I thought were my best friends not want me around?  She told me they thought I was partying too much.  Oh, I was so hurt.  I ran back up to my room where they were now changing to go out.  I locked myself in my room.  They left but not before taking obligatory going out pics on the balcony...ya know, where everyone could see them, including me.  I had never felt this sort of pain.  I was being shunned by the girls who I had pledged my sorority with, experienced two life-changing years of college with, gone on trips with, shared crazy memories was too much to handle.

I called one of my good friends who was in a different sorority (I didn't want to involve anyone else from mine) and asked her to come over.  I didn't want to be alone.  She came over (thank God) and made me feel better.  I am so thankful for her helping me calm down and go to bed that night.  Before I went to bed I threw my bottle of vodka away...on the sidewalk.  I tend to have a flair for dramatics.

Things weren't the same after that night.  There was a tension between us.  I tried to patch things and work on our friendships, but they wanted nothing to do with me unless I changed.  That was really hard.  I didn't drink for a couple months after that because I was really concerned that my friends thought I had a problem.  What's strange is while I immediately stopped drinking and partying they continued to do so.  It didn't make any sense to me.  It was like I was doing everything wrong while trying to get back in their good graces and they weren't working on mending the friendship at all.

Then I got angry.

Our other roommate seemed to essentially take my place in the circle of friends while I was relegated to outsider.  Like any group of girls, our sorority had its cliques and I was ostracized from my group of friends because of the situation with my roommates.  My life sucked for a couple of months and I moved out of the sorority house and into my parents house for a while, commuting to and from school each day.

More and more crap happened--meetings with advisors and the president of the sorority, huge blow ups between my roommate and I (the one that I shared a bedroom with), documents signed because I was viewed as a threat.  The girl who I shared a bedroom with (and the one who took my place in our circle of friends) reported me to someone on the Executive Board because of two incidents. 

The first was that I locked her out of the room.  I don't remember why I locked it but I do remember it wasn't a malicious act at all.  I think I thought she wasn't going to be back anytime soon and I locked it so I wouldn't be bothered.  She flipped out and banged and yelled from the other side of the door.  I immediately unlocked it so she could come into our room.  It really wasn't a big deal.  Or so I thought.

The second incident was after we had been living with the tension in our suite and we pretty much hated each other.  I had come home late one night after a party and turned on the lights, completely disregarding her.  I was being a bitch--remember the flair for dramatics?  Not long after that she came home late one night and turned on the lights.  I asked her to turn them off.  She said that since I had turned them on while she was sleeping she could turn them on while I was sleeping.  I got up to turn them off.  She turned on the lamp in between our beds.  I turned it off.  She went to turn it back on and I slapped her hand away.  All hell broke loose after that and she dramatically said, "Don't hit me!"  She gathered her things and left to sleep somewhere else.  I knew I would be in trouble.

Everything escalated until we were living in a hate-filled suite with no communication whatsoever.  It is the strangest thing in the world to live with three people who at one time were your very closest friends to people who you don't even speak to. 

Eventually I moved rooms and lived with an adorable girl who was a joy to live with.  We weren't close friends but we were perfect roommates.

To this day I am not sure why they decided to ostracize me from the group.  It's apparent I didn't have a drinking problem because I could immediately stop with the partying.  We had had issues in the past because they were a part of a secret organization that I wasn't asked to be in.  (The excuse being that they didn't think I could handle it because my dad had recently died.  Good call!  Don't include me and keep secrets from me because I just lost one of the most important persons in my life!)  Perhaps it had something to do with that.

I can recognize today that my actions during that time were the same as if I had experienced a loss.  My best friends and I broke up.  Suddenly.  With no warning.
A year after all of that happened I wrote my two ex-best friends letters letting them know how I was sorry for how I handled the situation and asked if we could be cordial to one another.  At all of our sorority events we still didn't speak or even really acknowledge the other person.  I put the letters in their mailboxes at the sorority house.  Neither ever responded to me in any way and we continued to hang on to that tension through our Senior year.

Today I want to forgive them.  I want this burden to be lifted off of my heart, and I want them to know that we all made mistakes in that situation.  I'm sorry for the disrespectful things I said and did.  They might never apologize for their actions, and they might not even think they did anything wrong.  There are two sides to every story.  But I know that I don't want to continue holding this grudge against them.  I'm not being fair to myself by continuing to do so.  I forgive you.

Wednesday, November 3, 2010

Day 3-- Something you have to forgive yourself for

It's been on my mind for the past 4 years and to this day I feel guilty about it.  I've talked to family about it and they've reassured me that I made the right choice, but I'm still so unsure. 

I'm terrified that I killed my dad.  When he was on life support my family was in the waiting room just...waiting.  That whole situation is really a blur for me.  I had received a call from my aunt earlier that day telling me they were taking my dad to the emergency room and to leave for Houston because they weren't sure he would make it.  I sobbed the entire ride.

We had known he had cancer for about three weeks and it was Stage Four esophageal cancer that had also spread to another body part--liver or pancreas, I don't remember.  He had immediately decided to tackle his cancer as aggressively as possible with both chemo and radiation.  (God, this is so hard to write.) 

My dad was obviously in a lot of pain.  He had lost an incredible about of weight in a very short time.  I think it was because he wasn't allowed to eat solid food.  The tumors in his esophagus might have caused him to choke.  I actually gave him his last meal.  When I was visiting him in the hospital one weekend he said he was hungry so I grabbed some Culver's burgers and headed over.  He loved it.  He said it was way better than the hospital food.  I'm really glad we got to share that together.

I drove as fast as I could to the hospital.  I had been taking a summer class in Austin so I was only visiting him on the weekends.  Had I understood how terrible and deadly cancer is I would have dropped the class and been with him the entire time.  I had no idea how bad "Stage Four" was.  Everyone I had ever known to have cancer had gone through their treatments and lived.  People don't die from cancer and especially not people I know.

When I arrived at the hospital my family was in the waiting room of the ICU.  They were only letting two of us go back at a time so I had to wait until someone left his room.  I finally got to see him and it was just tubes and a hospital bed.  My dad didn't look like my dad.  He was bloated and unresponsive.  I asked the nurse how long he would be like this.  If he was going to die.  I don't know if she meant to scold me, but she told me not to say those things around him because he might hear me.

I couldn't stand to see him like that.  I didn't spend a whole lot of time with him in his room.  I wanted answers.  My cousin is a nurse and told me that Stage Four esophageal cancer is basically a death sentence and that they never should have given him so much chemo and radiation.  My grandma asked me if I wanted to take him off life support.  People were telling me the only reason he was still breathing was because of the machines.  I know the decision was made with other family members' input, but if I had said no I wonder if they would have gone with my decision. 

We took him off life support.  I was holding him as he died.  My family held hands and prayed over his body.

I need to forgive myself for taking him off life support.  I know it wasn't my decision alone, and I recently learned that he had signed a "Do Not Resuscitate" document.

My dad was a fighter and the strongest guy I knew.  Some of my fondest memories are from when I was a kid and he would let me crawl all over him.  I would ride on his shoulders, hold his leg and make him walk with me there--I miss him so much.

Tuesday, November 2, 2010

Pretty Pearls

It's definitely not your classic single strand pearl necklace, but it's a beautiful, timeless piece.  Do want!

From J. Crew

Day 2-- Something you love about yourself

Oh, this is easy!  I love everything about me!  ...just kidding.  :)

There are some things that I do love about myself though.  I think I love my hyperactivity the most.  It's caused me to be extremely active and always looking for something to do.  I get bored very easily.  I have to be around people.  I get restless when plans aren't made and I'm proactive about getting friends together to do random activities.

I love that my friends are so social too, because it lends itself nicely to my personality...which I guess is the reason why we're friends?

At one point in college I felt like I was the only person that would make plans and gather the troops.  I was really annoyed with my situation.  It was like no one else wanted to do anything but sit around unless I said, "Hey!  Let's go hang out at The Capitol and play hide and go seek!"  (By the way, that's really fun if you haven't tried it.)  I realize now that there was no reason to feel that way.  Even if I was the person with the plan, everyone jumped on board and we would have a great time.  Luckily I got over myself.

I'm so moody sometimes.  Hormones?  I don't know. 

Just for funsies here's another thing I love about me: I forgive.

Sure, I'm a moody girl, but I get over things really quickly.

Example: You forgot to invite me on the NOLA trip next month?  Wow, that really sucks!  Why am I friends with you?  You can just forget me like that?   ...Ok, over it.  Y'all have fun!  Can't wait to see the pictures!  Maybe get a drunk dial from Bourbon Street? 

That's a true story by the way.  My friends did forget about me (also the reason for this emo post), but like always, I got over it really quickly.  There are 3 little steps to take to ensure that I will forgive you.

1. Own up to whatever you did to hurt my feelings.
2. Say you're sorry.
3.  Hug me.  (I really love hugs.)

That's it.  Do that and I'm putty in your hands.  BFFS4LYFE again!  However, if you fail to follow those three steps, I fail to get over whatever happened.  It's not pretty but I can hold a mean grudge.  Not one of my best qualities.  It stems from my inability to trust people who hurt me, and in my little head, if you follow the forgiveness steps then you are a nice, good, trustworthy person and I will continue to be your friend.

It's not complicated.


Don't forget that today is Election Day!  Go vote!  It's so important that you exercise this right.  We are incredibly blessed to live in this country where everyone can vote and say what they want and we're not persecuted for our actions.  I love America :)

I really like this quote from blogger Kristen after she went to Jon Stewart and Stephen Colbert's joint rallies in Washington D.C.: "The rally was a reminder of how blessed we are to live in the United States, a place where everyone gets a vote, where we are free to share our opinions, where government is changed without bloodshed or military coups, and where differing political views may polarize, but never jeopardize our safety or our economic standing.  In a time when so much political animosity abounds, it was refreshing to see so many people come together to say, hey, LET’S TAKE IT DOWN A NOTCH.  We’ve got it pretty good."

[images courtesy of and]

Monday, November 1, 2010

The Perfect Man

We see him in pretty much every RomCom.  He's the nice guy who is also funny with some quirk to him.  Girls might not immediately like him because of the quirk, but in the end it's endearing and he gets the girl.  Or whatever.

My perfect man has the following qualities:

Gentlemanly:  This really isn't that hard and I'm not sure why guys have so much trouble with this but open the dang door for girls!  If you are on a date you better be paying for her.  And for goodness sake ASK HER OUT!  I'm totally cool with the Girl Power movement that's been going on for the past couple of decades.  I'm a feminist.  I love equality, but I also genuinely appreciate a Southern Gent.  This is a must.

Treats me like a princess: I was incredibly spoiled by my daddy because he literally did treat me like a princess.  I was the most important girl in the world to him.  He showered me with gifts and affection like any father should, and now I expect the same from the man of my dreams.  Think about it guys: when you have a daughter don't you want her boyfriend to think the absolute world of her?  Would you feel comfortable giving her away to a husband that treated her ok and was sort of nice to her sometimes? 

Independent:  As a single girl, I would love to constantly be around my perfect man, but realistically when I'm in a relationship I need me time and I need girl time and neither of those involve my man.  Plus, it's really annoying when you plan an activity with your girls and then one of them brings along their guy.  It ruins up the whole vibe, and topics become off limit because he's there and others might feel awkward about opening up to him.  Unnecessary.  My guy should be comfortable without me.  We are not attached at the hip.  Be free little bird!

Is a badass: It doesn't matter exactly what he's a badass in, but Napoleon Dynamite was right.  Girls like guys with skills.  Soccer, dog walking, cooking, jay walking...he needs to have a passion for something and excel in it.

Has a job: I have one.  You should too.  I can't stand slackers.

Same values: He's gotta love him some Jesus.  Our kids are going to be raised Christian so there's that.  And he should be socially liberal, fiscally conservative.  Equality for all and smart spending?  Yes please!

So if you happen to see my perfect man in your neck of the woods, I give you permission to give him my number. 

[image courtesy of]

Day 1-- Something you hate about yourself

Last week I decided to do 30 days of blogging to answer some pretty deep questions.  I figured it'd be interesting for me to think about and it'd teach you things about me that you probably otherwise would never know about.  Seriously, how many times have you had a casual conversation at a party about the person who hurt you the most?  Probably never.  That's usually saved for a more quiet, personal discussion with close friends.  Not in BlogLand!  Home of the Free, Land of the Over-sharers.

So for today: I hate that I'm so forgetful.

I have the worst memory of anyone I know.  I constantly have to write things down to remind me of my day to day tasks.  But it's not the day to day things that really bother me about my forgetfulness.  It's the important life memories that I can't recall completely that really bothers me.  This is especially heart breaking when it comes to memories with people that are no longer a part of my life because we either drifted apart or they died.  I so want to remember every single detail that I shared with my dad or my grandpa or my childhood friends.

At the same time, I really only remember the good times from the past.  I have a habit of blocking out the bad things that happened.  My mom told me that part of the reason why we moved from Westlake to South Austin when I was a kid was because the other kids made fun of me and I would come home crying.  I have no recollection of my classmates hurting my feelings.  I don't even know the reason they were making fun of me.  All I recall from elementary school is meeting my best friend and having an awesome time with her and all of our friends.  Trick-or-Treating, school carnivals, cheer-offs (a la Bring It On before that movie even came out) on the playground, Live Oak, learning to play the recorder, Tamigchis and Limited Too...those things I can remember.  They were so important to elementary age me.

That's how most of my childhood memories are.  I only remember the good.  I remember riding on my daddy's shoulders through parks.  I remember my grandpa giving me orange tic tacs and a pack of lifesavers every time I saw him.  When I was a little girl, the funniest thing to me was when my grandpa would fall asleep and his snores would shake the house and his dentures would peak out between his lips.  The visual still makes me laugh.  Certain things (like orange tic tacs and lifesavers) always bring a smile to my face.  I didn't really like orange flavored things before my dad died.  Usually I'd give the orange flavored bits of candy to friends because I wouldn't eat it, but now I can't share that flavor.  It's almost as if by sharing it I feel like I'm giving away a piece of my dad.  And I can't pass up those sugary orange slices either.

Perhaps it's a blessing in disguise that I have only positive memories.  According to my memory, I had the best childhood in the history of the world!  And I ate a lot of candy.

[images courtesy of and]