Monday, November 1, 2010

Day 1-- Something you hate about yourself

Last week I decided to do 30 days of blogging to answer some pretty deep questions.  I figured it'd be interesting for me to think about and it'd teach you things about me that you probably otherwise would never know about.  Seriously, how many times have you had a casual conversation at a party about the person who hurt you the most?  Probably never.  That's usually saved for a more quiet, personal discussion with close friends.  Not in BlogLand!  Home of the Free, Land of the Over-sharers.

So for today: I hate that I'm so forgetful.

I have the worst memory of anyone I know.  I constantly have to write things down to remind me of my day to day tasks.  But it's not the day to day things that really bother me about my forgetfulness.  It's the important life memories that I can't recall completely that really bothers me.  This is especially heart breaking when it comes to memories with people that are no longer a part of my life because we either drifted apart or they died.  I so want to remember every single detail that I shared with my dad or my grandpa or my childhood friends.

At the same time, I really only remember the good times from the past.  I have a habit of blocking out the bad things that happened.  My mom told me that part of the reason why we moved from Westlake to South Austin when I was a kid was because the other kids made fun of me and I would come home crying.  I have no recollection of my classmates hurting my feelings.  I don't even know the reason they were making fun of me.  All I recall from elementary school is meeting my best friend and having an awesome time with her and all of our friends.  Trick-or-Treating, school carnivals, cheer-offs (a la Bring It On before that movie even came out) on the playground, Live Oak, learning to play the recorder, Tamigchis and Limited Too...those things I can remember.  They were so important to elementary age me.

That's how most of my childhood memories are.  I only remember the good.  I remember riding on my daddy's shoulders through parks.  I remember my grandpa giving me orange tic tacs and a pack of lifesavers every time I saw him.  When I was a little girl, the funniest thing to me was when my grandpa would fall asleep and his snores would shake the house and his dentures would peak out between his lips.  The visual still makes me laugh.  Certain things (like orange tic tacs and lifesavers) always bring a smile to my face.  I didn't really like orange flavored things before my dad died.  Usually I'd give the orange flavored bits of candy to friends because I wouldn't eat it, but now I can't share that flavor.  It's almost as if by sharing it I feel like I'm giving away a piece of my dad.  And I can't pass up those sugary orange slices either.

Perhaps it's a blessing in disguise that I have only positive memories.  According to my memory, I had the best childhood in the history of the world!  And I ate a lot of candy.

[images courtesy of and]

No comments:

Post a Comment