Thursday, August 19, 2010

Tainted Childhood

I went about my usual routine getting ready for work--

6:00 am: alarm goes off
6:01 am: turn off alarm
6:01 am: Cooper starts barking
6:37 am: Cooper goes back to sleep
7:15 am: second alarm goes off
7:15 am: hit "snooze"
7:15 am: Cooper starts barking
7:24 am: hit "snooze"
7:33 am: turn off alarm and get up because Cooper won't stop barking
7:35 am: walk the dog
7:45 am: feed the dog
7:46 am: take a shower
7:55 am: do my hair & makeup
8:05 am: find something to wear
8:10 am: when I should be walking out the door
8:17 am: walk out the door and see this face
8:18 am: speed to work (hopefully with no traffic or I'll be late)

My routine really can't be messed with because there isn't much leeway for screwing around.  I don't eat breakfast at home because it's more time efficient to eat it at the office.  The only thing that sucks about that is if there is a morning meeting, then I don't get to eat until 10:00 am or so.  Then I get upset.  One of the hazards of being me is that when I don't eat I get grumpy and sad at the same time, and if I'm just dying of hunger there's a chance I'll start crying.  I'm not normal.

As I was getting ready this morning a song from my childhood came on: "The Banana Song" by The Cranberries.  It is the best song EVERRRRR and it's oh so much fun to dance to and yell "BANANA BANANA" over and over again at the chorus!!!  Oh, you haven't heard of that song?  That's because most people know it as "Salvation," but my parents were cruel and didn't correct sweet, innocent baby me when "The Banana Song" came on.  I would just sing sing sing to my little heart's desire a song ABOUT HEROIN.  It was constantly on repeat during our many roadtrips.  The song ABOUT HEROIN!!!  No wonder I am who I am.   I wasn't like normal kids rocking out to Hanson or 98 Degrees (yes I was), but was rocking out to a song where the singer melodically, beautifully sings about HEROIN!  Thanks parents for allowing me to become so obsessed and in love with a song about bananas (my favorite fruit, and I'm pretty sure this song was the reason for ever even choosing a favorite fruit, because really, who has a favorite fruit besides the kid who sings about heroin?).

PS: This is a perfect explanation of how freakin delicious the Beer Brat from Man Bites Dog at the South Austin Trailer Park & Eatery.

PPS: When I told my mom what the lyrics were to this song she told me that it was okay because it was about not doing heroin.  Good call, mother.  Good call.  Parenting in the 90s at its finest.

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